On wanting to look like a Russ Meyer Mermaid

It could just be the rumour of Spring sending me off kilter but I'm giving serious thought to dying my hair pillar box red again. Back in the mists of time I had proper red hair. It was very long and very red and I both loved it and hated it. It was this colour when I first met Alphaboy and given that his ideal woman looks like Ariel, the Little Mermaid, if she'd been designed by Russ Meyer the combination of the hair and the, urrm, rack meant that I was a sho in .I know that he misses it. Over the years it has flirted with purple and black and now settled on a kind of very bright henna type shade. Not really the same.

My reasons for stopping dying it such an extreme shade were many. Firstly there was the getting older thing. I have a dread of not knowing when to stop. You know when you see those women who should have stopped doing a certain thing five years ago and nobody told them? That was my fear. Nobody wants to be Muttony. Secondly, the upkeep was immense. As well as being very long my hair is also naturally dark brown. Or it was, it's probably grey these days, but as I colour it every four weeks nobody need know this. Getting it to the required shade of crimson required lots and lots of very strong bleach, hours of time, and a stupidly high pain threshhold. It also played merry hell with my hair. I lived in semi constant fear of going bald. Given that I'm hideously lazy when it comes to the old personal grooming thing I grew to resent the hours spent on upkeep. Thirdly, there is always The Dreaded Clementine Factor. Folks who know me will get what I mean, but given the fact that I work in a bookshop, had silly dyed hair and am ever so slightly flighty/hard work/ a complete bloody nightmare/charmingly whimsical ( depending on whether you love me or not) comparisons were made. Made and resented. Massively. In a protest too much kind of way.So, yeah, I gave up on the red hair thing.

I do kind of miss it though. Once in a supermarket a small girl told me I looked " Just like a Princess" Given that it was early on a Sunday morning and I was in my PJs with unbrushed hair this was the most wonderful compliment ever and made me glow for weeks. It had to be the hair. Be honest, who wouldn't want to look like a princess in an eight year old's imagination? Then last week, whilst watching the BAFTAs I saw the very beautiful Jane Goldman looking quite staggeringly beautiful. Older than me and not a bit muttony or daft looking. Set me thinking.....Obviously Alphaboy is much in favour of the idea, but he is hardly an impartial observer. Might ask Alphagirl and if she does that teenage withering thing I'll know I'm onto a non starter.